Labor/Delivery with Libby Nicole ♥

I've been SO looking forward to writing this post for weeks now because my labor and delivery with baby #2, who we named Libby Nicole Fletcher, was such a crazy good experience. A huge thank you to everyone who read the first post about my labor/delivery with Alexa and I hope you enjoy this one as well! I'm excited to share how much Hypnobirthing and education in general enhanced the birthing experience the second time around.

On Monday morning (February 6th) I woke up around 3a with what I thought might be surges (more commonly known as contractions but Hypnobirthing uses different terminology). I started tracking them with an app on my phone and noticed that they were pretty close together. However, I did my best to listen to my body and felt like I could definitely wait a few hours before I thought about heading to the hospital (I wouldnt recommend this for everyone but in the beginning of my labors the surges are so gentle that I know I have time before things get serious). I told Braedon, texted my best friend McKenna who was on standby to watch Alexa, and decided to go back to sleep for a bit. When I woke up the surges were still very light so I took a bath in our big jacuzzi tub and shaved (because who knows when the heck you'll have a chance to do that again after giving birth), packed the rest of my things, and spent some time with Alexa. Oh, I also took time to stitch up some leggings that I really wanted to wear after having the baby. Ha ha! When I texted Braedon to tell him that he told me I could iron some of his shirts while I was at it. I told him not to get carried away (I hate ironing and never do it).

McKenna came over around 11a as I was finishing getting things ready. When I was all set to go I sat Alexa down and told her that next time she saw me she'd probably have a new baby sister. I teared up as I told her how proud I was of her and how much I love her. I had no doubt she'd be an awesome big sister. I was so emotional as I thought about how these were my last moments with her as my only child. I asked Kenna to snap a few pictures of us and I'm so glad we did. I love my spunky gal.

                                            

 I headed over to the hospital and told Braedon that I'd update him with whether or not I'd be staying once I was evaluated. Sure enough I was 80% effaced and dilated to a 5 so I decided to stay. After the whole check in process was completed they informed me that one of the Birthing Suites was available (there are two rooms and they get filled on a first come first serve basis; you have to be pre-approved to deliver there). I was so happy! Here are pictures I took when I first toured the Birthing Suite area back in October. Isn't it so beautiful and peaceful?

                                         

  Once I got settled in I decided that because my surges were still really soft I would take a nap. I had a good little snooze on that queen bed and then decided I wanted some lunch when I woke up. The main nurse who was helping me, Leslie, found me a turkey sandwich, chips, and cookies. Yummy. At this point I also went through my birth plan with her so that her and the other staff were aware of some of the things that were very important to me. Some of these things included:
1) Intermittent monitoring of the baby (we used a Doppler to check the baby's heartbeat once an hour instead of having my hooked up and unable to move around).
2) Access to a birthing ball (yoga ball), birthing stool, and, of course, the tub.
3) Not having an IV.
And probably the two most important things to me which were
4) Not being coached to "push" the baby. I told them that I'd know when it was time and (as Hypnobirthing suggests) I would be picturing "breathing the baby down."
5) I wanted to have skin to skin with the baby immediately and for her to not be taken for measurements for the first hour so that I could bond with her and nurse her.

By now it was the early afternoon and I could tell that surges weren't really getting stronger. This made me a bit nervous because, in my experience, when you've been at a hospital for a few hours and not much has changed, all of a sudden they want to do what they need to to get your labor to speed up (this happened the first time with Alexa). Sure enough, when my doctor was finally able to come see me that was exactly what she recommended. She said things like "if you're hungry enough to eat a sandwich then your labor isn't progressing fast enough" and how we should "break my water because if my labor isn't moving then we'll have to use pitosin" and etc. I can honestly say that this was the only part of my whole experience that was super disappointing to me. Over months and months of seeing this doctor and my other doctor (they share a practice and switch off weeks so whoever is on for the week will deliver the baby) I had shared countless times about how I was doing Hypnobirthing, how I wanted to let my body do what it was going to do, etc. I felt pressured and almost threatened and that was frustrating and disappointing. I told her I wanted some more time and then I'd let her know.

At this point I finally decided to ask Braedon to come over to the hospital and told him my dilemma about the doctor's suggestion. I had decidedly pretty firmly not to intervene with the process, but I also knew that if they broke my water (Hypnobirthing calls it releasing the membranes) then my labor would speed up, intensify, and we'd have our baby girl very soon. Also, I had practiced and prepared for intense labor, so I was confident I could handle it well. I felt super torn and kind of frustrated, but eventually decided to do it. Braedon showed up and a few hours later, at 4p, the doctor released the membranes. And then I knew it was show time!
*(Please note that at this time I had been having surges for 12 hours and was dilated to about a 6, but could still barely feel the surges at all. I think that if/when we have our next child I should either just decide that I'm fine with having the membranes released to progress the labor or I should plan to stay at my home a lot longer before going in so that I don't feel pressured at the hospital)*

I got in the tub pretty  much right away and Braedon and I spent some time talking, joking, and laughing before I started to focus more on the Hypnobirthing. Something SO neat is that Braedon was WAY more involved in the process this time. Little things like light massaging and encouragement made a huge difference for me. He also made me feel like a champion the whole time I was in labor. It was a very intimate and powerful experience for me (and hopefully for him as well). At 5:10 (an hour later) it was time to monitor the baby again so I got out of the tub and went over to the bed where the monitor was. That's the last clear memory I have of the time. An important part of the hypnosis is time distortion; basically making yourself feel like surges are shorter than they really are. This makes the difficulties of labor more bearable. Libby was born at 6:20p which means from that point on I was in labor for about another 1 hour 10 minutes. Although it was extremely painful and difficult it definitely felt like a much shorter time than that. So the time distorting was successful! Another important aspect was affirming to myself about positive things about my body/labor. This was a great tool as well.





After the monitoring I got out of the bed and ended up in a sitting position again (which I wasn't too surprised about because that happened the first time as well. I tried a few positions, but the most bearable was sitting down and leaning forward on a yoga ball. At one point Braedon asked me, "should I get Brooke here?" (Brooke is a good friend of mine who took the labor/delivery photos as well as Libby's newborns). Looking back in hindsight I'm SO glad he asked because she ended up arriving and taking pictures for not very long before Libby was born. I was so focused that I would have completely forgotten to ask him to get a hold of her. What a blessing that was because the photos are AMAZING and I will cherish them forever.

Later that night as we were visiting Braedon and Brooke told me that they could SEE surges happening in my body and how incredible it was. I got to see what they were talking about when I looked through the pictures (notice the contraction of the stomach in the second photo). I know it shows a little more skin but I wanted to share it because seriously, how amazing is that!?

                                         

Around this time I hit that sort of wall that I talked about in my first post. When nearing completion the body sends out a surge of adrenaline that creates a fight or flight sort of reaction. I am SO happy I learned about and prepared for this because I distinctly remember a moment where I thought "this is too painful, why did I decide to do this," and instantly remembered that that thought meant I was almost done! It was such a cool experience. Only minutes later I felt my body bearing down and knew she was about to be born. I vaguely remember saying that someone needed to call the doctor. Braedon helped me up and as he walked me to the bed I remember asking again, "is the doctor almost here?" They said they had called her and she was on her way (from across the street). I told them to get the other doctor because I knew she wasn't going to make it (the have a doctor there at the hospital at all times in case the delivering doctor can't make it in time). Sure enough I laid down and she was crowning. The couple of "pushes" I gave felt more painful than I remember with Alexa, and I think that's because before, when I didn't know what my body was doing, she was lower in the birth canal for longer, and came out a little easier once I actually started bearing down. But all of a sudden, there she was. This BEAUTIFUL little human that had been growing inside me for 9 months.

Looking at daddy for the first time

Probably the single most rewarding part of this whole experience was that I was SO aware of and in tune with her from the moment they handed her to me. Even just days after Alexa was born I didn't have any recollection of really holding her or our first few hours together. I think Hypnobirthing really put both her and I in a position to be aware and creating bonding memories.







Also, get this. Just MOMENTS after she was born (before the placenta was even delivered or anything else) THE POWER WENT OUT and the back-up generators didn't kick on. It was so crazy! I was extremely grateful that they didn't go out while I was still in labor. Everyone pulled out their cell phones flashlights so the doctor could navigate and finish everything up. It was quite a memorable occasion.

After I had bonding time with Libby (and the lights had come back on) Braedon was able to meet and hold her for the first time. We didn't end up deciding on her name until after 11p that night because we took some time to study her and just enjoy having her with us. 

My favorite ♥

 

Eventually we gave her up so that they could do her measurements. It was so fun to see all of the similarities between her and Alexa. Check this out!

Libby Nicole: born at 6:20p after water being broken at 4:00p. Alexa Rae: born at 7:19p after water being broken at 5:00p. I was in intense labor for exactly 2 hours 20 minutes with both of them.

Libby Nicole: 8.0 lbs. Alexa Rae: 8.3 lbs. 

Libby Nicole: 19.5 in. Alexa Rae: 19 in. 

Libby came three days before her "estimated due date" and Alexa came two days before hers.

The last step of a very big day was introducing Alexa to her new baby sister. McKenna brought her over to the hospital and we could tell immediately that she was going to love her deeply. She had said "baby seester" SO many times while I was pregnant, but when she saw Libby for the first time and said it, my heart just melted. ♥

Overall, labor/delivery with Libby was an indescribable experience. Hypnobirthing hopes to help women create pain-free labor experience. I wouldn't go as far as to say that I didn't experience pain, but it was definitely more manageable that my labor with Alexa. Not to mention the many other benefits I feel like I received from my study and preparation.

No matter what circumstances encountered when a woman labors/births it's safe to say that our bodies are divinely made and can do incredible things. Even from conception it's a miracle that something so teeny tiny can grow, inside a mother's body for months, and come out a beautiful little baby. 

Life has pretty frequently felt like chaos the last 2.5 weeks since adding another child to our family ( I'm sure I'll be writing about that soon too), but I am SO grateful to have two beautiful daughters and to be raising them with my best friend. I'm also grateful for two incredible labor/deliveries, especially because I know that things don't go as planned or even as well for a lot of other people. And there is no doubt in my mind that modern medicine blesses a lot of people through these experiences. But I REALLY hope that these posts open your mind to unmedicated birth if it's option for you. And if its not something you can or want to do then I hope you're at least more inclined to further seek for options and knowledge so that your future labors/births can be the best they can be.

Thanks for reading! ♥

Labor and Delivery: What I think everyone should know

You want to know what's been on my mind a lot? BIRTH.
This may have something to do with the fact that I'm now coming up on 39 weeks pregnant, but who knows for sure.
A few years ago when I got pregnant with my first baby, Alexa, I became interested in looking at what options I had for birthing her. In a hospital, at home, pain relief medications, no medications, etc. I watched documentaries, read books, and talked to my doctor about all my questions and his opinions on the variety of choices I had. I quickly realized how much I loved the idea of "letting my body do what it was supposed to." Birth had always seemed so natural to me, and I was fascinated with why so many people had opinions about controlling the process. I wondered if I would want to go as far as having the baby at home, but it didn't take me long to decide that I wanted to have her at the hospital.
Something I decided early on in my pregnancy is that I wanted to at least "try birthing a baby" without pain medication once in my life, and it seemed like it would make the most sense to do that the first time as opposed to using pain relief the first time and then doing it the "harder way" sometime after that. So although I was open to making adjustments during labor if I felt I needed to, I was pretty determined to just ride it out without medication.
Throughout the months of my first pregnancy I was very disappointed in two things:
1) How much ridicule I received for wanting to have a baby without pain medication. I can't tell you how many times another woman would call me "crazy" or "out of my mind" for this decision. Many women seemed to be of the opinion that if there's a drug to use, you should use it! The ironic part is that never once did I give another woman a hard time for wanting to use pain relieving medication.
2) It seemed like every woman and their dog felt the need to tell me about the horror stories of their labor. It never made sense to me why people were so willing to share the negative aspects of these things with someone they KNEW would be going through similar challenges.
So I had to make a conscious decision. Would I let others' opinions and fears determine how I was going to birth my child, or would I stand up for what my instincts told me and attempt to bring her into this world with as little assistance as possible? And I chose the latter.
My experience with having Alexa was truly incredible. I will add, however, that there were so many MORE resources I didn't know about at the time that I could have used to better prepare. Which is really the reason I'm writing this post! So first, I'm going to give you an overview of my my labor with Alexa (pros, cons, etc). I made the decision to record my labor/her birth in my journal and am SO glad I did (I just reread through it). Afterward I'm going to tell you about all I've learned since then and why I'm even more excited for this upcoming adventure!
Alexa was due on October 15, a Wednesday. On the Monday before, October 13th, I started to feel some cramping in the morning. We had plans to go down to St. George (we lived in Cedar City at the time) so we left town around 9a. I really had no idea what contractions were supposed to feel like, so I was pretty unsure of what to expect. Around 11 or 11:30a my friend Kim (who had just had her third baby) downloaded an app on my  phone and insisted I try to track the cramps/contractions. They were about 3-6 minutes apart and Kim told us we needed to head back to Cedar. I debated for over an hour before we decided to leave (at that point I hardly felt any discomfort).
We decided to run to the hospital for a quick check and then go home so I could actually pack a hospital bag, do some laundry, shower, and an ongoing list of things I planned to do before going into labor.
To my utter astonishment, when I finally had a physical exam sometime after 2pm I was completely effaced and dilated to more than a five. The nurse told us that we needed to stay. Fast forward through my hysterics of things not going quite the way I planned... and a few minutes later we had moved to another room (where I had access to a tub like I had requested). Okay, now I'm not going to give you all the details, but here are some of the basic events that followed. Around 4p I hadn't progressed much so the doctor suggested we break my water. I was EXTREMELY hesitant to do this because I was really trying to "let my body do everything on its own." After some discussion I agreed to have my water broken, which was done at 5p. Up until that point contractions had been consistent but very bearable. After my water was broken, not so much.
All of a sudden there was no relief from contractions. They were constant, one of top of another. They were strong, different than anything I had felt, and to be blunt, painful and difficult and to tolerate. I had imagined that the hot jacuzzi tub of water would help but I couldn't get comfortable in it. In fact, I ended up in a sitting position the rest of the time I was in labor. I still vividly remember saying to Braedon at one point, "I don't think I can do this." To which he cleverly replied, "well, she's going to come out anyway; you don't really have a choice." (I will talk about this moment later on because it's very important).
At a certain point I felt my body pushing, like, involuntarily PUSHING, and it freaked me out because I didn't know why it was happening and I literally couldn't control it (this is another important moment). When a nurse came to check on me and I told her about the urges I was having and she advised me not to push because last time they checked I was only at about 6 centimeters dilated. She said that she'd go get a yoga ball because she noticed I'd been sitting the whole time. From what I can guess this was probably somewhere around 7p (two hours after my water had been broken). And then the most INSANE thing happened... I reached down and felt something hard and smooth. At that moment I thought "oh my gosh, that has to be her head."
Right then the nurse came back and after telling her twice that I felt something she said we should get me to the bed to check me. She and Braedon helped me up, and when I stood up there was no doubt in my mind that that baby was right there. Sure enough, when they got me to the bed and she checked, the baby was crowning. They told me to breath through contractions and not to push (they had called my doctor and he was on the way). He arrived within ten minutes and after two strong and painful pushes, Alexa Rae Fletcher was born.
Pretty crazy, right? I definitely never imagined that it was going to happen that way. But it did! And it was an adventure for sure.
Because my labor went so well the first time I knew that I wanted to do it unmedicated again when I had another baby. I also knew that there were probably other resources I could find and use to have an even BETTER experience the next time around. So again, I started researching. When we moved to St. George two years ago I started asking around about doctors, hospitals, and birthing methods. I heard about something called Hypnobirthing: the Mongon Method and was instantly drawn to it. I decided to take a six weeks course and it literally CHANGED MY LIFE and seriously enhanced the way I view labor and birth. Here are some of the things I've learned.

There are a few things I've always felt instinctively about labor and childbirth that have been confirmed to me over the last few months throug my study of Hypnobirthing.

1) My body knows how to have a baby and the best way to have a baby is to let my body do what it's meant to do.
2) Women are bombarded with inaccurate and negative views of labor/birth via media and stories of other women.
3) Labor can be and is meant to be a beautiful experience that is anticipated with positive affirmations and excitement.

For those of you who are unfamiliar with the method of Hypnobirthing, in my own words, it's basically founded around the belief that a woman's body is perfectly equipped for labor/birth and that labor is experienced best by using the mind to achieve a deep state of relaxation and using the body's natural pain relief (endorphins) to manage the discomforts of labor. Hynobirthing also uses very different terminology when referring to the aspects of labor. One example is that instead of using the word "contractions" I now use the word "surges." Throughout the few weeks I attended the class I was able to actually practice hypnobirthing (the achieving deep relaxation) and have continued to work on it since the class ended. Along with the practice I learned A LOT of things that helped me better understand some of the details of my labor with Alexa.
Going back to my first labor: I mentioned that at one point I said, "I don't think I can do this." I've since learned that around the time a woman's body feels the urge to push, the body sends out a surge of adrenaline which imitates the flight or fight response. My instructor told some hilarious stories about women going as far as to all of a sudden declaring during labor that they're leaving the hospital. Not only was this neat to learn so that I now understand why I reacted that way, but I think it will be a great tool for my upcoming labor with baby #2.
I have also learned about how important and normal it is to move into whatever position feels comfortable and right during labor, and that it's good to reposition whenever you feel like it. Previous to learning this is seemed odd that I was most comfortable sitting the first time, but now it makes much more sense.
Another thing that was confusing to me was when my body was pushing and I couldn't control it. I feel silly, but the now obvious explanation is that my body was ready to push! I think I felt I needed a nurse or doctor to tell me what was going on, but in reality, my body was just doing exactly what it needed to do. And the fact that Alexa was born just minutes later shows evidence of that. I know that now understanding this will be a HUGE help with my upcoming labor.
I also look back on the experience and think it's sort of ridiculous that the nurses instructed me not to push when I was very obviously ready. I understand that the point is for the doctor to deliver the baby, but it doesn't make sense to not push when a baby is ready to come. I have learned so much about trusting the baby to come when he/she is ready, which is why I feel that unnecessarily inducing labor doesn't make sense.

So here are some of the things I'm excited about for this time around!
1) The Hypnobirthing class has taught and allowed me to spend time and effort practicing relaxation that I will use during childbirth.
2) Here in St. George at the hospital they have two rooms called "birthing suites." These rooms look like beautiful hotel suites with a white queen-sized bed, dimming candles, options for relaxation music, and large jacuzzi tubs among other things. The rooms are meant to allow women to have an "at-home" experience while still being at the hospital. I'm very excited to use one of these rooms during my upcoming labor!
3) Braedon had the opportunity to attend a class with me where he learned about different subtle ways to assist me during labor. The first time we had no idea how he could help, but he was able to learn about some things like things to say and soft massage to help release endorphins (natural pain relief).
4) Between already having one baby and now understanding SO much more via my studies I feel much more prepared to have the kind of labor and delivery best suited for both me and my baby. I know some very specific things I want (which I'll share in my next post) and I know that I need to communicate them clearly to the nurses/doctor in order to have the experience I want.

Just to end, I do want to put a few disclaimers out there. I do understand that there are circumstances and emergencies during labor/birth that can't be controlled and that those circumstances call for intervention. However, I do also believe that intervention is far too common among situations that would play out just perfectly if they were to be left to their natural course.
The other thing I want to mention is that I highly respect all nurses and doctors who are a part of this labor/birthing process. In addition to that, the reality is that they do have agendas and schedules. It is up to YOU to fight for what you want in your own labor/birth. I recommend putting together a written birth plan and discussing it with the involved staff right away when you check in to the hospital. And if there are things recommended/suggested to you that you don't want, I think it's perfectly fine to respectfully decline and stick to your plan. NO ONE can understand your body, your desires, and your baby the way you can.

The main purpose of writing this blog post is to spread awareness and to empower women (and men) and to help them see how effective, beautiful, and amazing natural labor and childbirth can be. If ANY of this interested you at all I highly suggested you take the time to study around and study Hypnobirthing in particular.
I will be writing another post to share the story about my labor/delivery with baby #2 and I am THRILLED for the amazing experience I'm going to have! ♥